Its been an long day for me.
It’s heart breaking to see the community that I spend so much time in split into 2 camps. It’s even more depressing that I was being banned from a site that I’ve been actively involved in. By a friend whom I’ve been supporting over the years without asking for any returns.
Whatever I’ve done in my initial blog entry, even if I was really breaking up the community like what they accused me of doing, I shouldn’t be banned without a warning. Even if I should be banned, there should be an email informing me of the banning and the reasons behind. I didn’t receive any email to tell me the reason behind my banning. That why I came up with my own conclusion out of anger. It was until after lots of complains by other pingsters did Uzyn wrote an official statement on my banning. It was posted on the forum, which I was banned from. I still didn’t receive any email from regarding my banning.
This made me very angry and disappointed. That’s why I wrote a series of blog entries last night out of anger. I only slept at 9am today.
I admit I crossed the line several times today. Some punches were thrown below the belt. But all along I never resort into calling names online. I know some of them from the other side have been calling me names on their blogs, comments, twitter and pluck. But I will not scoop to that level and return any fancy names.
I was reading back and I admit that I shouldn’t have said some stuff. Being angry is no excuse for those childish post. I keep saying about others in the past, but when I land myself in the same situation, I couldn’t control myself and practice self restrain. Now I fully understand their reaction when they were being banned.
But I still stand by the things that I’ve said in the beginning. I still believe that the whole “In Group” comment is not good for the community. I still feel that it will split the community into 2. That why I voiced out my views, hoping that will do something about it to prevent an elite group from forming. Some of you said that the method I use is wrong. I admit it might not be the best method, but end of the day, I still have the community at heart. I’m doing it to prevent the community from breaking apart.
At one point of time, I was asking myself, why am I doing all these? Why risk damaging my reputation? Why land yourself in their blacklist book? After all, I’m running a business related to blogs. I’m running for Omy blog awards now. I’m negotiating a blogging assignment with a company. Why put myself into such risk?
Why risk my company being backslashed by the community? Why risk being drop from the Omy Blog award? Why risk being rejected by the company?
Cause I don’t wish to see this community split into 2 camps. Many of you might disagree with me that a simple personal blog entry by Daphne will do so much damage. But I’m seeing the whole issue from the other side of the fence. I saw the cracks forming with my very own eyes. With regulars telling me that they have given up on the community. I can’t sit there and let everything collapse.
My approach may not be the best. I could have handled this issue better. I should have practice more self restrain. I’m sorry that I didn’t. The emotions was too great for me to control. I admit I really lost it. I’m sorry to the people I’ve hurt. I know some of you might not accept my apologies. I respect your decision.
End of the day, I still wish the community will return to it’s former glory.
You may or may not believe what I’ve said. I’ve already put forward my personal views on everything in this blog. You have every rights to form your own judgement. If you don’t agree with me, then please at least allow us to agree to disagree.
That’s all I want to say about this issue. I’ve already said a lot today. I’ll stop blogging about this issue from now on as promise earlier today. I will be reading your comments and blog entries. I’ll reply if there is a need to clarify anything. Else, I’ll rest my case.
As for the banning issue, if Uzyn unbans me, I’ll return back to the community and continue to give him the full support that I’ve given him in the past. If he feels that I should remain banned because of the things that I’ve done, then I wish him and his team all the best for their future endeavors.
Written on 6 July 2008, 6:45pm.

Many people knows that there a lot of arguments between Daphne and me. But not many people knows that the first argument started way back in July 2007.
It was a few days after the first anniversary party. There was a huge argument between some members. There was huge tension within the community. So some members decided to meet up over dinner to chill out and relax. We had some dinner and proceed to Blue Jazz Cafe for a drink.
I can’t remember exactly all the attendees. All I can remember was Nicole, Hendri, Sylv, UFC, Arzhou and Daph. Rinaz was there for dinner but left early. (Pls forgive me if I missed out your name for that gathering)
During the beer session, we chatted about the recent happening in and how it can be prevented. I mentioned that we need a moderator system where selected members can help remove offending entries. I said that I told Uzyn about this and he agreed that we need to have a moderator module, but it was delayed because Uzyn was busy.
Someone suggested that pingsters can help develop the module since we have quite a few programmers. I said that it might not be possible because I feel that Uzyn, like most programmers, will be protective on his codes and might not be so comfortable to open it up for others to help code.
It was a good discussion with several other interesting point being discussed. But I didn’t expect it to cause the first major argument between Uzyn and me.
That night, for no reason, Uzyn MSN me and said that he is very disappointed with me. That he always trusted me and even wanted me to be the moderator for in the future. He said he is disappointed with the things that I did and I’m destroying the whole site.
I was confused. Everything happen out of nowhere. I don’t even know what is he talking about. What did I do to disappoint him. And he was going on and on about how disappointed he is without telling me the cause. I asked him what happen and all he said was “You know what you did”. But seriously, I don’t know.
It was only after countless of questioning and a heated argument when I finally discovered that it was because the things I said over beer was mis-quoted by Daphne.
Daphne told Uzyn that I said he was purposely delaying the moderation module. And that I wanted to keep to himself and refuse to let go.
I was shocked when I hear that. How did my words get misquoted so badly? My only explanation was that Daphne was very new to the community at that time and doesn’t know what is going on. In fact, if I remember correctly, she joined less than 1 month only.
But I was very pissed off with Uzyn that time. When Daphne told him something that was so unlike my character, instead of checking out the facts first, he came over and confronted me straight. He believes everything she said. Despite all the things that I’ve done for the community during that time. He rather listen to someone who is in the community for less than 1 month than open his eyes to see what I’ve been doing.
I was so pissed off that night that I wanted to quit It was a very tense period with flame war between 2 other pingsters. And Daphne’s comment didn’t help at all. I posted a blog entry titled “Backstabbed” and said that I’ll stop blogging for a while. Deep inside, I wanted to quit for good.
Then Sekling spoke to me convinced me to stay on. I removed that entry from my blog and asked Uzyn to delete it from I later replaced it with another blog entry to down play the issue.
What does this whole incident tell us?
Uzyn trust Daphne a lot. So much that he was guided toward the wrong direction without knowning.
Daphne is hyper sensitive and misquote people.
No matter what you have done to the community, you still might be wrongly accused of trying to destroy the whole site.
It’s been almost a year already. Some things doesn’t change.
Special Edition: DK vs “In Group”

I’m at my Sister’s house now, celebrating my nephew’s 5th birthday. Got a call from a close friend regarding one of the entries that I wrote. He said I crossed the line.
I relook at that post and agreed with my friend and everyone that commeted there that I indeed crossed the line in that post. I was really very very angry last night regarding the ban. That why I wrote several blog entries to voice my happiness.
But I do agree with everyone that my post on “DK not insightful enough for awards” was too much and crossed the line. Being angry is no excuse to post such defaming entry. I’m sorry for that entry. Sorry to Uzyn, Daphne and everyone in for that entry. I’m ashame that I wrote that entry last night when I was angry.
I’m really sorry for that childish post. Please accept my apologies.
But I still stand by the remaining article that I wrote. And yes, as promised, I will stop blogging about this issue after today. You have my words.
Last but not least, I want to say again that I’m sorry for that entry. Sorry.

After my entry about the “In group”, a large number of bloggers twittered “I’m in. are you?” at the same time.
Daphne even openly declared that everyone’s in.

Anyway, it was a big hullabaloo about just ONE word. I hope it’s clear now.
uzyn daphnemaia sheylara hendribudi uraywong wishbone brokenshardz sylvdoanx twistedian jerricklim krisandro claudia10 litford
Everyone’s in. Are you?

But I find it strange. Is everyone supporting the “In group”? I private twitter one of them asking why she twittered that message. A few hours later, I got this reply from her.

dunno man, Daphne IMed me asking me to tweet it, so i did. that’s it. anyway, nad pinged me about your blog post, so i sorta know now..

Due to my safety reasons, I will not reveal who is she. In case she ganna backslashed by the “In group”. Or worse, banned from
I read the reply with disbelief. You mean Daphne ask you to twitter without telling you what’s the reason behind it. It’s like tricking you to say you support her “In group” without knowing you did. That’s hitting under the belt!!
I know some of them know the full story before they twitter. But how many of them didn’t know the full story behind it before twittering? How many were con into doing it? Did they know what are they in for? They have openly supported the elite “In Group”.
And Daphne claims that everyone’s in. But she didn not mention that Nadnut and foxtwo said that they are out. Cobalt Paladin also said he is out on Daphne’s blog. And a lot of pingsters sat on the fence. Is that “everyone”?
Special Edition: DK vs “In Group”

Update: After reading the comments from everyone and relooking at this entry, I agree that I really crossed the line for this entry. It was indeed a punch below the belt. I’m sorry to everyone affected by this entry. Please accept my apologies.
I will not cover up my mistake. This is really a childish post. I will leave it here for everyone to read to see my foolishness when I was angry. I am only human. I make mistakes too. I’m sorry. If you are angry with this entry, you have every rights to flame me.
The finalist for the awards was released before I was banned from the community.
I don’t know about everyone, but it wasn’t a surprise to me when I didn’t see my blog in finalist list. Perhaps I wasn’t good enough to be in the finalist for awards.
But I was in the top 10 finalist for Omy Singapore Blog Award 2008 – Most insightful blog category. A panel of judges from omy’s editorial team selected my blog out of the 122 nominees.
I was the winner of award 2007 Most Insightful Post award and Best Citizen Journalism Post award.
I was also nominated in 5 out of 9 category in the award 2007.
But looks like I wasn’t good enough for the awards 2008. Or was I?
The initial list of nomination is handled by the community manager, whom I have arguments with. From what I understand (correct me if I’m wrong), only the post category is open for the organising committee to vote. The blog category wasn’t. How was it selected then?
So is my blog really not insightful enough for awards? Or is it because I didn’t apple polish the community manager? You be the judge.
We will never find out the real truth……
Special Edition: DK vs “In Group”